No Access to Original Programming

Dear HBO Executives:

I just paid $1.99 to iTunes and Bravo TV in order to download the latest episode of Project Runway‘s third season. Note: I paid. I didn’t use µtorrent to download it; I legally paid for my copy. If you could find it in your heart to team the hell up with iTunes already and offer me the greatness of Deadwood‘s last season, its two subsequent movies, and additional seasons of Rome, I would be a very happy camper indeed. I am more than willing to shell out some of my hard-earned money to see these episodes. You might wonder why I don’t sign up for cable, but c’mon–I’d get a whole lot of shit I don’t want and I’d have to go out and buy a TV. And wait for the damn cable guy, anywhere from 8am – 5pm. Not gonna do it. I will, however, give you $1.99 on a weekly basis. Get with the program, HBO Execs! Love, WordNerd.

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I rarley log onto Yahoo! Messenger these days–after using it as the main method of communication for the Dyn-o-mite! empire (hah!), it’s not needed in the current iteration of my work life. I use it rarely to speak to family and friends, but I must emphasize rarely. However, whenever I do log on, I never fail to get one message that reads:

“Please send me a message when you’re out of the program.”

This comes from a lovable (not) doofus who I think actually live in VA but is employed by Dyn-o-mite! My friend who quit her job back in August 2004 still gets the messages when she logs onto her account–I guess the guy has never thought of deleting old employees from his list. Granted, I could delete him, but then he’d get a message saying that I banned him and that would just make the poor dolt feel like a sack of crap. Well, probably not, but I’m lazy. What I’m really hoping for, though, is a chance to–say, on Veterans Day or something–be lounging around my apartment on my day off, Yahoo! Messenger running. His message for us to tell him when we’re out of the program will pop up, I’ll tell him I’m not in the program, and he’ll ask if he can send me a proof. I can almost assure you he would ask; it would not occur to him to wonder why I haven’t been on the proofing list since January.

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Why am I still up, listening to music? It’s 10:30! I should’ve been asleep half an hour ago.