Breakfast Knows No Equal*

So what do I enjoy most about traveling? Breakfast at cheap fast food restaurants!

I have an unnatural love of breakfast; it’s the one meal I would never willingly skip. What puts me off most about long runs and race days is the fact that I usually can’t eat before the run; I am irritable without food in the morning. Make no mistake – it must be breakfast-y (unless we’re talking pizza or chocolate cake; then all bets are off).

When traveling, I make it a point to find breakfast. With IP, I’ll target hotels with continental breakfasts as an amenity. The reasoning is two-fold: it saves us time and keeps me happy. The primary advantage, though, is keeping me from being a major crank.

Tradition calls for these meals. I fondly remember road trips with my family to Mexico or Cedar Point (the only two WordNerdian destinations from 1980 to 1994, it seems). The trips involved quick breakfasts, mostly gobbled in the car. I still remember Dad biting into Egg McMuffins and steering with one hand after my mom had carefully arranged the wrapper so he would not eat it. On the occasions when we would stop at the restaurant, we’d get pancakes instead of sandwiches (which led to a few incidents of me spilling syrup onto my clothes, which in turn pissed off my father, which in turn led to me standing at a bathroom sink, Mom trying to wash out the syrup from my clothes – and, um, sometimes hair, but don’t ask me how I managed that one).

In airports, though, and especially at a trip’s (usually) early commencement, I’m all about finding a McDonald’s, Wendy’s, or hell, even a Burger King to satisfy my need for microwaved eggs, biscuits, and hashed potatoes. I am a rare visitor to these types of establishments in everyday life, but become a major fan on travel. There is nothing more indicative of a cross-country or trans-Pacific (well, almost) journey than greasy potatoes and coffee that must be dressed by the control freaks at some places that hoard their collections of Equal and cream. Breakfast meals are the first step in my many miles, connections and time zone crossings – give me my cheapo breakfast to prepare me for the day!

For the first volley in what is fast-becoming an annual business trip (and is combined with a vacation this time around), I enjoyed a number one meal at McDonald’s (with the fold-over egg, though – concentrated yolks calls forth the bile, you see) with a small coffee to keep me awake at least until I board the plane. I anticipate only one more airport fast food breakfast as most of my subsequent flights are red-eyes. Here’s to hoping that meal’s at Wendy’s.

(Author’s note: alas, that did not happen as Phoenix’s airport, as noted here, sucks).

*Written July 13, 2008 on the plane from BWI to Phoenix.