Survey Says: Maryland!
I don’t spend a lot of time in DC. IP is always befuddled that I am will answer “Maryland” when asked the question “Where do you live?”. It’s not like I haven’t been conditioned to claim the bigger city. When anyone asks me where in Michigan I grew up, it’s always “Ann Arbor” as opposed to “Saline.” Good god, who wants explain why Saline is pronounced Sah-leen and not Say-leen? And who wants to claim Milan, which is pronounced My-land in stead of Mih-lahn? For some reason, though, I can’t own DC.
Not that DC is a bad place – far from it, of course. It is, however, something I rarely see. My commute is the quintessential reverse commute – I start my morning in one state, pass through DC, and end up 45 minutes later in another state. A state, by the way, that I dislike, and have disliked since 2005 (stupid Henrico County; additionally, the whole Arlington-Alexandria area seems like Greek Life, Part II). In the evening, I gladly exit Virginia at top speed, once again pass underground through DC, and end up in Maryland. Meanwhile, our apartment is a five minute walk away from the district border. I am in constant close contact with DC, but it doesn’t get to see me strolling its streets often unless I’m making several Gordon Biersch runs in a single week (alas, the Rockville one is subpar). Sure, there’s the occasional odd visitor and more frequent invites to do something in town, but meh. I admit it: I’m the laziest introverted person in the world. Give me my kitchen table, a book or my laptop, a cup of chai, and we’re talking living. Or, alternatively, give me a good trail, lots of water and some mountains. That’s paradise. Bar-hopping, dancing, continuous museum-going and show-catching? Not my speed unless the show I’m catching is performed by the Royal Shakespeare Company.
IP insists that we’re in the DC metro area and should just answer “DC” when we’re asked our place of residence, but something within is stubbornly pedantic when it comes to this matter. When I wrote the engagement announcement that my mother insisted upon (and is being published shortly), I listed us as living in Maryland as opposed to DC. IP shook his head while I raised my eyebrows in faint amusement. I’m not going as far labeling myself as a Marylander—I will always be, in some way, shape or form, a Michigander—but I’m strongly attached to saying I live in Maryland. When we were vacationing in Hawaii, people would ask us where we were from, I’d say “Maryland” as IP said “DC.” He’d give me the stink-eye and then explain his reasoning—Maryland means nothing to people whereas DC does. The nation’s capital! Home-to-be of President-elect Barack Obama! Site of Forest Gump’s splash into the Reflecting Pool to reach his Jenny!
That’s all well and good, but I still don’t do it. When I’m in business in far off lands, people will ask my colleagues and me where we’re from. “Virginia,” I’ll blurt, citing our home office location, my colleagues immediately saying, “Washington, DC.” I snicker a bit to myself—if only I worked in DC, I wouldn’t have to put up with NoVA!—but I still can’t answer DC. I don’t know if it’s the bitchy pedant in me or if I’m really just cementing the fact that our stay in the DC area is transitory and, at least in my case, tenuous given where I live and work—to claim DC itself means I’d have to own it, and while I doubt that this would lead to loving it (in reality, I don’t enjoy big cities that much), it does mean I’d have to allow myself to begin to enjoy it. At the end of a long week, though, floating between Maryland NoVA, DC isn’t that appealing. It’s just a byway to me, and that’s I think that’s ultimately why I have trouble claiming it. Again, if I actually worked in DC? I might be more inclined to claim it, own it, enjoy it. As I only pass through it, it’s hard to develop any kind of sense of familiarity with it.
Besides, I like Maryland. I enjoy Wheaton, with its mix of Hispanic cultures overlapping on one another; I actually like Rockville, where they hold races and where the shopping’s somewhat decent; I love Kensington because my wedding gown will be there in four months and I cannot wait to have it on me again (complete with mantilla veil that I’m having custom made for way less than designer prices). Whereas many people flock to the city for fun, I’m the type who’d love to find a good orchard, visit the Amish market my fellow Marylanders are always talking about, and have a cozy meal at the Parkway Deli.
For now I’ll stick to Maryland as my preferred answer. If I’m lucky enough to get away from working in NoVA and into DC (though working in Rockville and Bethesda would be such an easy commute!), perhaps I’ll warm up to the answer then.
