FYI Slash PSA
Asking a woman if she wants to touch your pregnant belly just because said woman is a newlywed (and addressing her only as “Newlywed”) is all kinds of weird. You’re assuming that a) the newlywed is looking to procreate at some point (you’re also assuming soon) and 2) the newlywed wants to touch you (a person she barely knows). If said newlywed didn’t ask to touch your pregnant belly when others around her did (and in fact walked away), that’s probably a clue she’s not interested. The newlywed may like to keep her three feet bubble of personal space around her at all times (Metro excluded, unfortunately); assuming that she—or anyone else, for that matter—likes to close up that space with strangers is asking for all kinds of awkwardness and/or trouble.
And when said newlywed says no and gets funny looks from everyone around? You made the newlywed look like a jerk when all she wanted was to tune out everyone and check her email.
See what happens when you assume? You make an ass out of u and me.
This has been a message from your friendly neighborhood WordNerd.
