Seat Yourself

The Washington Post and the Express had a story on seat hoggers on Monday—y’know, the outside seat/bag is suddenly human people who inhabit our not-so-fair system. While I didn’t particularly feel like writing about the topic, I did leave a snarky comment on the Express’s online poll. And whaddya know, it made it into print on Tuesday morning:

So yeah, I admit, I do target seat hoggers. Like I said in the comment, I’m not mean about it—I do give them a smile and say “Excuse me” quite politely. But I do relish some of the reactions I get because it just confirms for me that some people on Metro are rude and entitled. Not everyone is grumpy about it; they’ll happily get up and let me sit down. But others do that sighing, lifting of the bags, the eye rolls and the shaking heads. Like I’ve impinged upon their personal space and am now violating some sacrosanct social norm. And nine times out of 10, the person is not getting off at the next stop, though they do make it a point to hop to the next available empty seat and proceed to hog that one, too. Don’t worry, I don’t follow them. I just smile a bit when a new rider gets on and asks to sit down.

What baffled me, as I discussed the issue on another site, were the people who said this wasn’t rude, and that they did it routinely because a) they’re getting off at the next stop (to which I say, don’t worry, I don’t mind getting up after one stop—I honestly do expect it on Metro and no, you’re not bothering me when you need to get off the train); 2) are prone to motion sickness (it’s great you don’t want to throw up on me, but make a reasonable effort to ask people if they want the inside seat); and III) are pregnant (limited mobility the farther along you are, I suppose; like the above, making a reasonable effort to ask people if they want the inside seat is necessary). I’ve honestly never come across an outside seater that looked green or was heavily pregnant, so I can give them a pass. But the people who whined that they were getting off at the next stop need to suck it up and say “Excuse me” once in a while, too.

And that brings up the other issue: people who are standing and are just glaring at the person hogging the outside seat? Speak up! I’m not a naturally social or assertive person, but I’ll be damned if I’m just going to sit there and glare. I did it too often in my 20s to my own discomfort and anger to be concerned with another person’s momentary huffiness in my 30s. Life’s too short to will other people to behave by the sheer force of your mindpower—say something, for Christ’s sake! You speaking up might make the person realize that, yeah, the social norm they have to follow isn’t the one that says they’re special and get two seats to themselves. Maybe they’ll clean up their act if they’re ask to move enough times.

So, it goes both ways. It’s rude and people need to say something.

And you know, it probably didn’t rate a WaPo front page story. ;)